A Giggle is Enough

What if you decided you wanted to learn to fly an airplane, but you knew nothing about it? Would you just climb in the cockpit of a 747 and give it a try? What would your odds of success be? What are the odds that you crash and burn?

I see many people new to the “Pickup Artist” community trying to become Mystery or Style or Juggler or whomever overnight. They can’t understand why they hit sticking points, and sometimes assume it’s something wrong with them. The problem is, you need to learn every step of the process in a logical progression. Whether you use Mystery Method, Zen Method, or whatever method, you need to take it a step at a time and work on the areas where you get stuck.

For many beginners, the approach is the biggest hurdle, and for many “Master Pickup Artists” approach anxiety is still an issue. Working on this issue in isolation will help you build your “approach muscles” to the point that you can then concentrate on other aspects of your method. One easy way to do this is set a very easy goal for yourself. Approach women and say something, anything, that will get them to laugh, giggle, or at least smile. That’s it. After that if you want to just walk off, or say, “nice talking to you,” and walk off, that’s fine. Very low pressure. Just get the giggle and go.

You’ll learn a lot of things from this simple exercise. First, that you will get a positive response from almost every woman you approach. It’s amazing how friendly most women are. Second, you get a real buzz from this. It’s fun to interact with other people. Just by virtue of being human, even if you consider yourself the most anti-social person on earth, the truth is your brain is hard wired for social interaction. Tapping into that part of yourself feels good, even if you have to dust off some cobwebs first.

Finally, I think you’ll find that you want the interaction to continue. The nervousness becomes secondary to the desire to keep it going. How to keep it going is detailed in my book, as well as the many other methods out there. Pick one and study it. Once you’re consistently getting the giggle, you’ll want to start going for the gold.

Good luck.

Approach Anxiety and the HB10

Some of us have worked on our "Game" enough that we can approach good looking women, but stall out and crash when we see a "10". A totally hot girl can definitely flip some switches in the old Lizard Brain, causing you to revert to AFC (Average Frustrated Chump) status in a hurry.

Here's one approach that might work in such a situation. The idea is to be honest about the fact that you're a little nervous to talk to this woman. But there's a catch. You're going to use that as a way to demonstrate higher value. How? Here's one scenario:

You see "HB10" walking your way, or standing next to you at party, or whatever. You can feel the old anxiety come up, but you force yourself to approach and say . . .

You: Oh god, I can't even talk to you
HB10: Why not?
You: I get too nervous around women I like. It's too bad too, because you seem really friendly. But now I'll never get to meet you.
HB10: Why do you get so nervous around women?
You: I'm scared you'll find out I'm a millionaire and then just marry me for my money instead of my personality. (or some other joke that does NOT lower your value. Be sure to smile so she knows you're joking)

And continue the conversation from there. Don't put yourself down.

So let me break this down.
You say something that will get her interest and let her know that you're a little nervous.
But that just makes you that much cooler for breaking through your nervousness and approaching her, so it actually demonstrates that you're a cool guy and interested in her.
You also tied your interest in her to the fact that she seems "really friendly", not just her looks.

Think this through and see if you can incorporate it into those situations where you might otherwise be too nervous to approach. Sometimes, saying your nervous is the best way to get beyond that nervousness and get into a conversation.

Good luck!